haiku chain by freddie omm describes snow on dunes, foam from waves, and a dog who playfully attacks the foam

work in progress: sketch of snow, dunes, sea and dog

 

when we want to live

a life more lit and touched with

fire we need the beach

*

where sea throws us waves,

surf singed with feels we can’t share

like words lost in storm

*

light snow drifts on dunes

while wind blows cold and dry, we

walk down to the shore—

*

foam flies from the waves

like smoke, rolls on soft wet sand,

the dog sniffs, bites it;

*

sunlight’s lying on the beach–

wet, shining now the ash-curled waves sink

reflecting sky:

*

clouds of flame and ash

float through blue, hidden heaven

soaking into earth

*

sky, flames, snow and wind, waves, foam and sand,

they and all of it are never still not ever but they move us

through us as we walk, wish, stand–

*

what I see, I write,

and with my words I try to

catch the snow and light

*

**

*

 

 

 

 

 

 

Photos by F. Oomkens

 

Comments

  1. James Wood says

    Atmospheric, suggestive haiku, whose stark-seeming simplicity and monosyllabic austerity conceals, as so often, cunningly camouflaged complexity.

    The haiku are loaded, full, pushing at the confines of the form!

  2. Camilla Levan says

    In these winter months, flames of passion and tender care don’t burn as high as we might like, but words such as these, gently observant, with no agenda, can inspire us to find joyful shared solace in nature and our surroundings and turn us on to consummation in each other’s arms.

  3. Amaya Singh says

    A brushstroke of self-reflection we rarely see in your poems!

  4. Philippe de Saint Maurice says

    The poem shifts and moves through from simple, literal description to a kind of artist’s credo.
    It’s about energy and its flow. It’s both a summary of Ommnian deeds and a statement of intent.

  5. Scarlett Ong says

    The opening and closing verses are monosyllabically worded, 17-syllable haiku, and they wrap or sandwich the more expansive verses between them. Those “contained” verses break out of the haiku form like the moving energy their words depict, scarcely containing their sense. The final haiku (the artist’s credo as James Wood calls it above) reverts to the simple-seeming monosyllabic haiku form about words trying to catch the snow and light. This is a balanced poem about the impossibility of balancing observation, reality, description, a wondrous expression and evocation of what poetry can do.

  6. Verity Worth says

    How very apt that a poem about movement is called a “work in progress”

    I wonder whether trying to catch snow and light in words, as you profess, is truly your aim in writing

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